My brother, stepbrother and I were sitting on the couch one evening watching Yo! Mtv Raps, and having a rap off! You know, see who knows the most words to the songs. We are sitting there fascinated by the style that some of the artist have and are looking to see what we can incorporate into our modest lifestyles. This was the time when putting the lines in your eyebrows was the thing. I wanted to try it but wasn't feeling like trying it on myself. I needed to see how it looked first hand. So with that thought in mind I look at my stepbrother Jason and nonchalantly said "man, you should let me hook you up". Him watching the videos and being into them also, shrugs his shoulders and says "OK".
The three of us head into the bathroom and prepare for the procedure. I got clippers in hand and as a seasoned surgeon I take aim and size up my operation. Jason lays his head back, eyebrows thick as bushes and patiently awaits as my brother is over my shoulder as my assistant. As I make my first cut, I move the clippers back and forth, just a little bit to make it visible. But, in my back and forth movement, I got caught up in the excitement moved a little too much! "Uh Oh, its too wide" I think to myself and at the same time looking at my brother to get his opinion. He's got this "that's, not cool" look. So, it leaves me going in once again to correct my mistake and decided while talking to myself that "maybe I should give the other line a friend and it will all blend perfectly". This move turns into a double whammy! His eyebrow is starting to look like a Morris Code book. Long line, short line, long line.
Now taking a step back to see what the damage is and how I might be able to repair this, my brother now has a "whatcha gonna do now" look on his face. We have a CODE RED! We are now in an emergency situation. I now have no choice and forced to make a quick decision. I decide to shave the brow half off and try to salvage it. This being now my third cut, I go in and shave half of the brow off. His right brow fully intact and the left brow now half there. Its not looking good! "Man, if my dad sees this, I am going to get a super beating", I start to think to myself. I cant leave the half brow there. It was too noticeable. "Maybe I can super glue the hair back on?" No, that wont work, with my luck I might super glue his eyelids shut. So, once again, faced with no choice, I think, "its probably best to remove it all" and in one swift move, the sound of the clippers like a lawnmower in heavy grass, I shred the left eyebrow off.
Hmmmmm, I start to find myself with my back against the wall often now. Every time I try to make a correction it was only turning out to be another fatal mistake. My brother who's giggling on the side, knows that this isn't turning out as planned. How did a simple line turn into a loss of an eyebrow? I am trying not to laugh and at the same time trying to convince my step brother that it will be cool. But, with only one eyebrow (the right one), I cant have him going to school like like that. With only one eyebrow everyone will surely see one is missing and I will be in big trouble. So, I have to make another emergency decision. With the look of the doctor giving his patient bad but hopeful news, I tell him "Jason, I'm going to have to remove the other one, but this time it will even everything out and it should be fine." He lays his head back and I begin.
Damn, damn, damn!! He is now looking like an 11 year old transvestite. Just as pretty as he wants to be. Not one hair on his face! Nothing but his eye lashes! A simple line turns out to be death of two eyebrows and I am a soon to be dead too. When my dad sees this, I am scared to think what will happen. I make a mad dash into my step sisters makeup bag, digging through looking for anything that can help me cover up the destruction I just caused. I come across a brown eyeliner pencil and get to coloring the best eyebrows that I can on him. Me trying to be a perfectionist but not taking into thought that you can't make a guys eyebrows like you would a woman's (I don't know how to put on any makeup). I'm all done, thin and pointy. They aren't the best but at least something is there.
I decide its best that I go hide out in my room and hope that dad doesn't see this. The night goes by fairly quiet for me. Dad comes home and I don't hear anything out of the normal, so the coast is clear. I just gotta make sure I give Jason some eyebrows for school in the morning. I have to buy enough time for them to start growing back in. I close my eyes and drift off to sleep.
I am in a deep sleep, blankets pull up to my neck and only my head sticking out. Out of no where I am awakened to a crushing weight on me, pinning me under the blankets and the sound of clippers making that click and hum as they turn on. Still startled, its too late! My dad has me pined under the covers and yelling "you want to cut people eyebrows off?" and dipping the clippers randomly into my perfect round little afro. I cant move! I only can try to yell and move my head around hoping he only grazes me. Wrong!! He was making deep gashing cuts into my head, here and there. I finally am able to get my head under the covers to avoid any more of the afro massacre. "No no no, my fro", I say over and over. As he leaves laughing and saying "I bet you wont cut anymore eyebrows off", I sit in shock. I rush to the bathroom to investigate the damage. I looked like a baby leopard. Spots all over my head.
After a night of light sleeping, not wanting another attack and wishing my hair grows back fast while I am asleep, its time to get ready for school. There wasn't enough hair products in the world that could cover the holes in my head. I combing hair this way and that way. Finally I decided, I am going to have to sneak a hat with me and take it off only when I had too. So that morning as we all wait for our buses to come. Jason, looking like a contestant on RuPaul's Show and me looking like I came out post op brain surgery, my brother sits in the middle looking at both of us with unstoppable laughter.
A long day of school ends and I return home. My brother and step brother are sitting in the living room. My step brother has makeup running down his face where I had drew his eyebrows on, from sweating and playing at school had him looking like a washed up sad circus clown. What started out to be stylish, ended up a fashion nightmare.
Sunday
Monday
Thats what friends are for!
Ah, the beginning of the school year! Every kid knows there are two times you have to look your best. The first day of school and the day after Christmas break. Being the first day I really needed to look my best. I go to my father and tell him I need new clothes for school. My father was never the type to take any of the kids shopping. He is the "I am cool, I will pick you out something" dad. He would rather go in and grab you something that his old ass thought was cool, rather than let you come and run the prices up on him. So, having no other choice I have to wait to see what he brings home. My mind is in panic mode. I am putting my style into the hands of the same man that walks around in wind breaker shorts, polo shirt and cowboy boots. Alarms are going off!!
So the day before school starts he comes in my room and tosses a couple pair of jeans on the bed. He's standing in the door looking like hes got some super style, nodding his head like I was going to be the freshest kid at school and waiting for his pat on the back. But, the jeans looked like he bought them from a hippie. One pair had a bleached leg, the other had bleached spots all over them. My only response was. "Ah man, you gonna get me killed"! "What man, what? These are what all the kids are wearing" coming from someone in late 40s. "They might have been what they were wearing when you were a kid but not kids now", I responded. "Boy, just put the jeans on and be happy you got something"!
Faced with no other choice, the hippie jeans or last year editions. I put on the jeans I think will least likely get me joked out of the lunchroom. The pair with one leg bleached! So, I am off to school. Now when you walked into school there is always that morning session while waiting on all the buses to come, you stand there and can get a feel for how the day might go. I was in trouble! Schools first bell hasn't rung and I am catching jokes. You know when people come up to you and say "where you get those jeans from? They are cool" then they walk away laughing. I knew it would be a long day.
So, as the day went on the jokes just kept coming. I myself was a joker so I had thick skin but after a day of getting bombarded, I was relived it was finally coming to an end. In my final class of the day, a friend of mine, Steve (name change) came up to me and was like, "man those jeans are fresh". Now here I am thinking, not you too. But, Steve and I had been friends since before school. He was my very first friend and we remain friends even up until now. But, I know Steve better than he knew himself and a compliment from him was almost like a conformation I had really messed up. Steve wasn't the brightest bulb, but his heart was always in the right place. He was strange like that. So when he told me he liked them, I was kinda like, yeah right man. But, I entertained his conversation. The more he talked the more I realized that he might really like the jeans, and liked them so much that he asked where I got them. He cant really like these (hell I didn't like them myself) and he is just trying to jerk my chain, I thought to myself. "I did them myself" I responded just to amuse him. But then, his eyes lit up like "for real?". "I got some black jeans at home, you think you can hook me up too?" "Sure man, bring them by and I will get right on it" with a come on man stop messing with me attitude.
I finally get home, complaining to my dad that he has really got me messed up and never go shopping for me again, the doorbell rings. Steve had borrowed his moms car and was at the door with faded black jeans in hand. "You ready to do this man?" he is excited and cant wait to let the master get to work. I have never bleached a thing in my life. I had no idea what to do, but I wasn't about to tell Steve that. He was so excited I couldn't let him down. I had to go through to the end. I grab a bucket, I grab the bleach and I grab some rubber bands. I had heard about rubber bands being used, didn't know for what but thought I had a good idea why. I wrap the rubber bands around the leg as many times as I can then I start dipping the leg into the bucket of bleach. All the while, I am bragging to Steve about how fresh he will look and that he is getting some custom made jeans. He was pumped. "I got some more jeans I can bring," Steve said "OK, but first, lets just see how these turn out", I responded.
As I remove the jeans from the bucket the smell of bleach had my eyes watering. It was dripping bleach everywhere and I had noticed the black leg wasn't nice and white but a nasty yellow. I wasn't very impressed with my work and was kinda disappointed it didn't turn out a little better. But, in Steve's eyes he saw potential. I tried best I could to ring out the bleach in the pants so that he can get them back home without it bleeding over to other parts of the jeans. I toss them in a bag and tell him to take them home and wash them real good. I even committed, "man, I don't think they turned out too good" but Steve wasn't hearing that. He was determined and left on his way home!
The next morning at school, I had resorted back to a last year model of jeans and was going under the radar. I was leaning against the locker watching all the action of early morning antics, when I hear laughter in the distance. One of the kids run by and say "you gotta see this". Here comes Steve, wearing the yellow leg, randomly spotted, black faded jeans walking like he was the man. This sent the morning crowd into hysterical laughter. Everyone laughing but Steve having no clue why. I try to rush to him to tell him the jeans are a bust and he might want to switch to his PE clothes. But, the bell sounds and Steve is off to his class before I can make the warning. The rest of the day I am hearing all the jokes people were saying about Steve, but I still haven't got to talk to him. I knew I would see him in the last period but by then it was too late the damage would be done.
I make it to last class of the day and Steve walks in to the sounds of more laughter. I approach Steve shaking my head, as I approach the stench of bleach is stronger and stronger. With his eyes wide open looking as if he has inhaled an ammonia capsule, Steve says to me " Man, I don't think the jeans turned out to good and mom is going to kill me." I asked why. Steve responds, that on his way home some of the bleach got on his moms car seats and he washed the jeans with other clothes his mom had put in the wash which had bled on to other clothes. So not only did he get a day of jokes, he got a load of bleached laundry and an evening of butt beating. I know, I know, what a bad friend I am, but feeling bad, I call Steve to apologize. He answers the phone, I can hear his mom in the background cussing him out. After I finish my apology, he pauses as if he is thinking and his only response is "Next time you need to make the rubber bands tighter!"
So the day before school starts he comes in my room and tosses a couple pair of jeans on the bed. He's standing in the door looking like hes got some super style, nodding his head like I was going to be the freshest kid at school and waiting for his pat on the back. But, the jeans looked like he bought them from a hippie. One pair had a bleached leg, the other had bleached spots all over them. My only response was. "Ah man, you gonna get me killed"! "What man, what? These are what all the kids are wearing" coming from someone in late 40s. "They might have been what they were wearing when you were a kid but not kids now", I responded. "Boy, just put the jeans on and be happy you got something"!
Faced with no other choice, the hippie jeans or last year editions. I put on the jeans I think will least likely get me joked out of the lunchroom. The pair with one leg bleached! So, I am off to school. Now when you walked into school there is always that morning session while waiting on all the buses to come, you stand there and can get a feel for how the day might go. I was in trouble! Schools first bell hasn't rung and I am catching jokes. You know when people come up to you and say "where you get those jeans from? They are cool" then they walk away laughing. I knew it would be a long day.
So, as the day went on the jokes just kept coming. I myself was a joker so I had thick skin but after a day of getting bombarded, I was relived it was finally coming to an end. In my final class of the day, a friend of mine, Steve (name change) came up to me and was like, "man those jeans are fresh". Now here I am thinking, not you too. But, Steve and I had been friends since before school. He was my very first friend and we remain friends even up until now. But, I know Steve better than he knew himself and a compliment from him was almost like a conformation I had really messed up. Steve wasn't the brightest bulb, but his heart was always in the right place. He was strange like that. So when he told me he liked them, I was kinda like, yeah right man. But, I entertained his conversation. The more he talked the more I realized that he might really like the jeans, and liked them so much that he asked where I got them. He cant really like these (hell I didn't like them myself) and he is just trying to jerk my chain, I thought to myself. "I did them myself" I responded just to amuse him. But then, his eyes lit up like "for real?". "I got some black jeans at home, you think you can hook me up too?" "Sure man, bring them by and I will get right on it" with a come on man stop messing with me attitude.
I finally get home, complaining to my dad that he has really got me messed up and never go shopping for me again, the doorbell rings. Steve had borrowed his moms car and was at the door with faded black jeans in hand. "You ready to do this man?" he is excited and cant wait to let the master get to work. I have never bleached a thing in my life. I had no idea what to do, but I wasn't about to tell Steve that. He was so excited I couldn't let him down. I had to go through to the end. I grab a bucket, I grab the bleach and I grab some rubber bands. I had heard about rubber bands being used, didn't know for what but thought I had a good idea why. I wrap the rubber bands around the leg as many times as I can then I start dipping the leg into the bucket of bleach. All the while, I am bragging to Steve about how fresh he will look and that he is getting some custom made jeans. He was pumped. "I got some more jeans I can bring," Steve said "OK, but first, lets just see how these turn out", I responded.
As I remove the jeans from the bucket the smell of bleach had my eyes watering. It was dripping bleach everywhere and I had noticed the black leg wasn't nice and white but a nasty yellow. I wasn't very impressed with my work and was kinda disappointed it didn't turn out a little better. But, in Steve's eyes he saw potential. I tried best I could to ring out the bleach in the pants so that he can get them back home without it bleeding over to other parts of the jeans. I toss them in a bag and tell him to take them home and wash them real good. I even committed, "man, I don't think they turned out too good" but Steve wasn't hearing that. He was determined and left on his way home!
The next morning at school, I had resorted back to a last year model of jeans and was going under the radar. I was leaning against the locker watching all the action of early morning antics, when I hear laughter in the distance. One of the kids run by and say "you gotta see this". Here comes Steve, wearing the yellow leg, randomly spotted, black faded jeans walking like he was the man. This sent the morning crowd into hysterical laughter. Everyone laughing but Steve having no clue why. I try to rush to him to tell him the jeans are a bust and he might want to switch to his PE clothes. But, the bell sounds and Steve is off to his class before I can make the warning. The rest of the day I am hearing all the jokes people were saying about Steve, but I still haven't got to talk to him. I knew I would see him in the last period but by then it was too late the damage would be done.
I make it to last class of the day and Steve walks in to the sounds of more laughter. I approach Steve shaking my head, as I approach the stench of bleach is stronger and stronger. With his eyes wide open looking as if he has inhaled an ammonia capsule, Steve says to me " Man, I don't think the jeans turned out to good and mom is going to kill me." I asked why. Steve responds, that on his way home some of the bleach got on his moms car seats and he washed the jeans with other clothes his mom had put in the wash which had bled on to other clothes. So not only did he get a day of jokes, he got a load of bleached laundry and an evening of butt beating. I know, I know, what a bad friend I am, but feeling bad, I call Steve to apologize. He answers the phone, I can hear his mom in the background cussing him out. After I finish my apology, he pauses as if he is thinking and his only response is "Next time you need to make the rubber bands tighter!"
Saturday
Up, Up & Away!
Kids nowadays aren't the same as when we grew up. We didn't care about playing video games and staying in the house all day watching TV. That's what you did when you couldn't go outside (rain or punishment). For us going outside was all we wanted to do and a lot of times got our butts beat for not being back in the house once street lights came on.
To be outside on the weekend was like a new adventure waiting to happen. In our neighborhood at this time there were about 11 kids (7 neighbor kids and 4 of us). At the time we lived up on the lake. We always had many things to do and get into. So, this one morning the sky was blue, sun shinning bright and we needed a plan for the day. We are all outside sitting in the driveway thinking of what we could do today. Then it hits me! We had just bought a refrigerator and had this huge box laying outside. Right beside this box was an old baby doll stroller from my step sister. As if a light bulb went off in my head, BING! Hang glider!
So as I gathered up some rope, the cardboard box, a clothes hanger, the stroller, and a few other key parts, I started to build. Everyone around started asking, what I was doing. I only told them "don't worry, I am about to be looking down at you chumps". This stirred their curiosity even more. The closer I got to finishing my flying machine the more I talked about how high I would be flying, "I can probably see the whole lake when I am up there", where I would be going, "I'm flying to the store and get me a bag of watermelon jolly ranchers". This started to make the others feel left out. I could start to see that they too wanted to take part in my dreams of flight. But with only one hang glider and 11 kids, there could only be one to fly it.
Finally my work was finished. It looked amazing! With the stroller fastened and wings spread out wide, everyone could see I was on my way. When I did my test flight (running and jumping off 3 steps) the kids were pumped seeing my very short glide! But....I did notice one big thing. The wings sure seemed a little flimsy on the ends. I started to do the math, maybe cardboard box wont support my weight (you think). So I secure it best I can and now its time for the big flight.
We had a place up the street that had a steep drop off and at the bottom was very soft red dirt. We called it the Chips Ahoy. You know kids come up with some crazy names for stuff. We would jump off this and yell Chips Ahoy, landing into the soft red dirt. This was ideal for a test flight with a huge open field and no trees around to fly into. I grab the hang glider and we start walking. As we are walking up and the neighborhood kids adding on more and more with each house we passed, my brother had really started to become envious. "I want to fly it too, let me try it", bugging me to death. "No way man, this is my hang glider I am going to fly over you and look down on you ants", I responded. As I was walking I could still see the ends of my glider flopping like a dead man's hand. I knew my flight might not work. I needed an escape route.
My brother! He was gullible but wasn't no dummy. He sat there with a look in his eyes like he was already flying it by the way I kept telling him what I would be doing. But, I knew if I offered first flight to him, he would know something was wrong. So I had to really flip it on him. The more I talked about what I would be doing and that he wouldn't be able to, the more he wanted to do it. I waited until the time was just right (when he started to blackmail me, "if you don't let me do it, Imma tell on you about this or that"). Perfect! So since I couldn't have him snitching on me. I had no choice. "OK, man damn, you can fly it first but I have to give you some pointers on how to do it." So as I give him a make shift tutorial he starts to look around at the other kids like, YEAH BUDDY! Its me, that's right! He was the man.
So finally we arrive at the launching site. The wind was slightly blowing, clear skies and a go for take off. We get back from the edge as far as we can to get max speed for flight. I give the hang glider to my brother and a look of determination came into his eyes. He was focused. Listening to my every instruction along with my "don't spit on us when you up there and don't fly too high" he was ready for take off. All the kids are on both sides making a beautiful runway and excited to see the first flight. I take position and tell my brother to run as fast as he can and make sure he pushes up on the bar once he jumps so that the wind can get under the wings. He takes a long look at the runway in front of him, going over in his head everything I told him to do. With a deep breath he takes off!
He is now running full steam. As he is running, I see the wings edges waving as to say "Bonn Voyage". The kids are falling in behind him as he passes each one. He eyes getting wider and wider the closer he gets to the edge. With one last step he leaps into the air. Now stop!!
(Have you have ever seen a Bugs Bunny cartoon and watched the Coyote and Roadrunner. You know how the Coyote always has that pause before he plummets to the ground?)
With one last step he leaps into the air! With that trademark Coyote fashion he pauses, the wings fold in like hands clapping, and he nose dives straight down! All the kids rush to the edge to look down at the wreckage. My brother laying, face covered in red dirt, tangled in the metal of the baby doll stroller, breath knocked out of him, could only mummer 4 words. "I'm telling on you!" It was worth every butt beating!
To be outside on the weekend was like a new adventure waiting to happen. In our neighborhood at this time there were about 11 kids (7 neighbor kids and 4 of us). At the time we lived up on the lake. We always had many things to do and get into. So, this one morning the sky was blue, sun shinning bright and we needed a plan for the day. We are all outside sitting in the driveway thinking of what we could do today. Then it hits me! We had just bought a refrigerator and had this huge box laying outside. Right beside this box was an old baby doll stroller from my step sister. As if a light bulb went off in my head, BING! Hang glider!
So as I gathered up some rope, the cardboard box, a clothes hanger, the stroller, and a few other key parts, I started to build. Everyone around started asking, what I was doing. I only told them "don't worry, I am about to be looking down at you chumps". This stirred their curiosity even more. The closer I got to finishing my flying machine the more I talked about how high I would be flying, "I can probably see the whole lake when I am up there", where I would be going, "I'm flying to the store and get me a bag of watermelon jolly ranchers". This started to make the others feel left out. I could start to see that they too wanted to take part in my dreams of flight. But with only one hang glider and 11 kids, there could only be one to fly it.
Finally my work was finished. It looked amazing! With the stroller fastened and wings spread out wide, everyone could see I was on my way. When I did my test flight (running and jumping off 3 steps) the kids were pumped seeing my very short glide! But....I did notice one big thing. The wings sure seemed a little flimsy on the ends. I started to do the math, maybe cardboard box wont support my weight (you think). So I secure it best I can and now its time for the big flight.
We had a place up the street that had a steep drop off and at the bottom was very soft red dirt. We called it the Chips Ahoy. You know kids come up with some crazy names for stuff. We would jump off this and yell Chips Ahoy, landing into the soft red dirt. This was ideal for a test flight with a huge open field and no trees around to fly into. I grab the hang glider and we start walking. As we are walking up and the neighborhood kids adding on more and more with each house we passed, my brother had really started to become envious. "I want to fly it too, let me try it", bugging me to death. "No way man, this is my hang glider I am going to fly over you and look down on you ants", I responded. As I was walking I could still see the ends of my glider flopping like a dead man's hand. I knew my flight might not work. I needed an escape route.
My brother! He was gullible but wasn't no dummy. He sat there with a look in his eyes like he was already flying it by the way I kept telling him what I would be doing. But, I knew if I offered first flight to him, he would know something was wrong. So I had to really flip it on him. The more I talked about what I would be doing and that he wouldn't be able to, the more he wanted to do it. I waited until the time was just right (when he started to blackmail me, "if you don't let me do it, Imma tell on you about this or that"). Perfect! So since I couldn't have him snitching on me. I had no choice. "OK, man damn, you can fly it first but I have to give you some pointers on how to do it." So as I give him a make shift tutorial he starts to look around at the other kids like, YEAH BUDDY! Its me, that's right! He was the man.
So finally we arrive at the launching site. The wind was slightly blowing, clear skies and a go for take off. We get back from the edge as far as we can to get max speed for flight. I give the hang glider to my brother and a look of determination came into his eyes. He was focused. Listening to my every instruction along with my "don't spit on us when you up there and don't fly too high" he was ready for take off. All the kids are on both sides making a beautiful runway and excited to see the first flight. I take position and tell my brother to run as fast as he can and make sure he pushes up on the bar once he jumps so that the wind can get under the wings. He takes a long look at the runway in front of him, going over in his head everything I told him to do. With a deep breath he takes off!
He is now running full steam. As he is running, I see the wings edges waving as to say "Bonn Voyage". The kids are falling in behind him as he passes each one. He eyes getting wider and wider the closer he gets to the edge. With one last step he leaps into the air. Now stop!!
(Have you have ever seen a Bugs Bunny cartoon and watched the Coyote and Roadrunner. You know how the Coyote always has that pause before he plummets to the ground?)
With one last step he leaps into the air! With that trademark Coyote fashion he pauses, the wings fold in like hands clapping, and he nose dives straight down! All the kids rush to the edge to look down at the wreckage. My brother laying, face covered in red dirt, tangled in the metal of the baby doll stroller, breath knocked out of him, could only mummer 4 words. "I'm telling on you!" It was worth every butt beating!
Monday
Kids and sleds not a good mix!
As a young kid, my brother and I always looked forward to that first snow falling. We took great care every year with our sled, making sure it was in tip top shape. We destroyed everything around the house but our long red plastic sled, it was like our trophy. When the snow came in day or at night it meant one thing, snow busting fast speeds, blazing down any bump, hill, or cliff.
This one particular snow, we had used up all the hills around the house and we seeked a more adrenaline pumping challenge and we knew only one place that could give us our fix. The community college!! The hills at the community college were a sled monsters dream. Long and steep, you were guaranteed a breath taking ride. But, the only problem was getting there. So, my brother and I knew we had to bring our best "sad puppy" routine. "Mom will you take us to the college to sled?" We had never been to the college before, we had yearned for this chance every snow day and we used that as leverage too! So, finally with us getting on her nerves enough, she gave into our request.
We were so pumped up and excited that now we were getting our chance. Trying to make sure that we had our warmest gear on (knowing we couldn't just come in the house and if we got cold the trip was over) we put on layer after layer of clothes. Dressed like two Michelin Men, we were off. Now, seeing that the college was in town and knowing we couldn't keep this all to ourselves. We talked mom in to stopping by and picking our cousin Marcus (name changed). We were two country boys and Marcus was (for where we were from) a city boy. He wasn't the sledding type and on snow days it just meant he didn't have to go to school and got to stay at home, messing around the house. So with a little convincing we talk him into coming out to the college with us.
So here we are, on the way to the much anticipated community college and we are all talking about the awesome tricks we are about to do. "Imma ramp off, do a 360, flip sideways, spin around, and probably be 30 feet in air" One after another trying to out-do the next persons dreams of grandeur. The college sat up high on snow covered hills like Olympus in the clouds. We pull up, looking at which side is best and trying to navigate mom to the place to get the maximum speed. The hills were perfect. These baby mountains looking at us and the best thing was no big dangers in our path. Only two very small dogwood trees and we could see that there wasn't any other tracks on the hills and it was all ours to be the first of the year to break this beast in. We dash out of the car, arguing over who would go first. But, that was all put to rest once we got to the edge at the top. My brother and cousin quickly had second thoughts, so without hesitation I knew I had to show them the way. I grab the sled, take the normal head first position (so that way you could steer with touching your hands to the snow) and before my mom can yell "wait" I am off. YOOO HOOOO!!!!! Snow blowing back in my face I couldn't see anything and could only tell how fast I was going by the strength of the wind in my face. The sled was screaming like a skier coming down a ski jump. It seemed like the ride was forever.
Finally, I reach the bottom, snow filling my face and nothing but eyes and a smile sticking out. WOW!!! Now any sled rider knows the worst part is the walk back up the hill and as I am walking up I can see that my ride has sent my brother and cousin into an excited frenzy. The closer I get to the top, the more I hear them bickering about who's next. Once there, my mom had talked my brother into letting my cousin go next because he didn't get many chances like this and we were always taught to be courteous. So I lay the sled down and hold on to it explaining how to steer and slow down. My cousin dives into the sled and he is off!! Now because he dives I notice that he isn't on the same path that I was on and starts off to the left. This was no problem there was no trees to left and the two little dogwoods were on the right side where I went. So I'm thinking everything is cool. But, as we watch him it seems as if he is now curving back in to the right and headed right for one of the little dogwood trees (as if the tree was reeling in a fishing line). You start to hear from a whisper to a yell, get over, Get Over, GET OVER! BLAM, head first into the smallest of two trees on the hill at full speed. When he hit, it was so square to the tree that he bounced in the air and hit and stopped at the bottom of this thin tree. "OH SHIT", my mom yells out! I on the other hand, thought I had just seen the funniest thing in my life lay on the ground cracking up and my brother standing there shocked. My mom with a panicked looked on her face demands us to come and make sure he is ok. I couldn't move! I was in such hysterics that she commenced to beating my ass! "Get your ass up now, he is badly hurt". They run, I roll and we make it down to my cousin. He laying there lifeless and limp. I look at the tree and notice some bark missing from where he had made contact. Then I look down at him and see the missing bark pieces all in his teeth. This sent me back into a tear flowing laugh again, which in turn got me a few more slaps up side the head. But good thing, he was breathing!
Now here we are trying to push him up these steep hills to get back to the car and he is dead weight. My mom you can hear her "oh God, oh God", my brother looking half disappointed that he got no turn on sled and half relieved it wasn't him that hit the tree, and me trying to push, getting butt beat and laughing at same time. So we make it to the top and jump in the car. My brother and I in the back and my cousin in the front seat. As we are riding to the hospital, every bump we hit is making the limp head of my cousin bounce around and in the backseat we are catching glimpses of his bark mouth silhouette and swollen lips, which again send me off into a gut busting laughter. My mom reaching around popping me every time she even heard a squeak.
We make it! The nurses comes and take my cousin away and my mom goes to make the phone call to my Aunt about what happened. My brother and I were discussing what happened, how did he hit one of those small trees so square on on these huge hills? A day or two passes and we return to the hospital to check up on our cousin. As we entered the room we notice he was in good spirits and come to find out he had only received 9 stitches in his lip and other than that he was fine. We had to ask him " What happened man? Why didn't you roll off the sled or brake? How did you hit those little trees? In a low tone not to move his lips too much he only responded, "my eyes were closed". Which may have saved his life due to him not expecting the contact, he was relaxed (like the drunk driver that walks away from the accident). So as a lesson learned, Never Sled With Your Eyes Closed!!
This one particular snow, we had used up all the hills around the house and we seeked a more adrenaline pumping challenge and we knew only one place that could give us our fix. The community college!! The hills at the community college were a sled monsters dream. Long and steep, you were guaranteed a breath taking ride. But, the only problem was getting there. So, my brother and I knew we had to bring our best "sad puppy" routine. "Mom will you take us to the college to sled?" We had never been to the college before, we had yearned for this chance every snow day and we used that as leverage too! So, finally with us getting on her nerves enough, she gave into our request.
We were so pumped up and excited that now we were getting our chance. Trying to make sure that we had our warmest gear on (knowing we couldn't just come in the house and if we got cold the trip was over) we put on layer after layer of clothes. Dressed like two Michelin Men, we were off. Now, seeing that the college was in town and knowing we couldn't keep this all to ourselves. We talked mom in to stopping by and picking our cousin Marcus (name changed). We were two country boys and Marcus was (for where we were from) a city boy. He wasn't the sledding type and on snow days it just meant he didn't have to go to school and got to stay at home, messing around the house. So with a little convincing we talk him into coming out to the college with us.
So here we are, on the way to the much anticipated community college and we are all talking about the awesome tricks we are about to do. "Imma ramp off, do a 360, flip sideways, spin around, and probably be 30 feet in air" One after another trying to out-do the next persons dreams of grandeur. The college sat up high on snow covered hills like Olympus in the clouds. We pull up, looking at which side is best and trying to navigate mom to the place to get the maximum speed. The hills were perfect. These baby mountains looking at us and the best thing was no big dangers in our path. Only two very small dogwood trees and we could see that there wasn't any other tracks on the hills and it was all ours to be the first of the year to break this beast in. We dash out of the car, arguing over who would go first. But, that was all put to rest once we got to the edge at the top. My brother and cousin quickly had second thoughts, so without hesitation I knew I had to show them the way. I grab the sled, take the normal head first position (so that way you could steer with touching your hands to the snow) and before my mom can yell "wait" I am off. YOOO HOOOO!!!!! Snow blowing back in my face I couldn't see anything and could only tell how fast I was going by the strength of the wind in my face. The sled was screaming like a skier coming down a ski jump. It seemed like the ride was forever.
Finally, I reach the bottom, snow filling my face and nothing but eyes and a smile sticking out. WOW!!! Now any sled rider knows the worst part is the walk back up the hill and as I am walking up I can see that my ride has sent my brother and cousin into an excited frenzy. The closer I get to the top, the more I hear them bickering about who's next. Once there, my mom had talked my brother into letting my cousin go next because he didn't get many chances like this and we were always taught to be courteous. So I lay the sled down and hold on to it explaining how to steer and slow down. My cousin dives into the sled and he is off!! Now because he dives I notice that he isn't on the same path that I was on and starts off to the left. This was no problem there was no trees to left and the two little dogwoods were on the right side where I went. So I'm thinking everything is cool. But, as we watch him it seems as if he is now curving back in to the right and headed right for one of the little dogwood trees (as if the tree was reeling in a fishing line). You start to hear from a whisper to a yell, get over, Get Over, GET OVER! BLAM, head first into the smallest of two trees on the hill at full speed. When he hit, it was so square to the tree that he bounced in the air and hit and stopped at the bottom of this thin tree. "OH SHIT", my mom yells out! I on the other hand, thought I had just seen the funniest thing in my life lay on the ground cracking up and my brother standing there shocked. My mom with a panicked looked on her face demands us to come and make sure he is ok. I couldn't move! I was in such hysterics that she commenced to beating my ass! "Get your ass up now, he is badly hurt". They run, I roll and we make it down to my cousin. He laying there lifeless and limp. I look at the tree and notice some bark missing from where he had made contact. Then I look down at him and see the missing bark pieces all in his teeth. This sent me back into a tear flowing laugh again, which in turn got me a few more slaps up side the head. But good thing, he was breathing!
Now here we are trying to push him up these steep hills to get back to the car and he is dead weight. My mom you can hear her "oh God, oh God", my brother looking half disappointed that he got no turn on sled and half relieved it wasn't him that hit the tree, and me trying to push, getting butt beat and laughing at same time. So we make it to the top and jump in the car. My brother and I in the back and my cousin in the front seat. As we are riding to the hospital, every bump we hit is making the limp head of my cousin bounce around and in the backseat we are catching glimpses of his bark mouth silhouette and swollen lips, which again send me off into a gut busting laughter. My mom reaching around popping me every time she even heard a squeak.
We make it! The nurses comes and take my cousin away and my mom goes to make the phone call to my Aunt about what happened. My brother and I were discussing what happened, how did he hit one of those small trees so square on on these huge hills? A day or two passes and we return to the hospital to check up on our cousin. As we entered the room we notice he was in good spirits and come to find out he had only received 9 stitches in his lip and other than that he was fine. We had to ask him " What happened man? Why didn't you roll off the sled or brake? How did you hit those little trees? In a low tone not to move his lips too much he only responded, "my eyes were closed". Which may have saved his life due to him not expecting the contact, he was relaxed (like the drunk driver that walks away from the accident). So as a lesson learned, Never Sled With Your Eyes Closed!!
Just getting started!
In my life I have experienced so much and I finally decided to share some of my adventures, travels and experiences. Some are funny, some are just adventures. Many people in my life have shared many laughs with me and I decide to share some with you. I hope you enjoy and feel free to comment on any story you like. I appreciate you taking the time to stop in and re live some of the Eagle's Travels.
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